Dry-stone walling and the power of lists

This blog has now been running for over a month and I haven’t missed a day; indeed some days there have been a couple of posts. I was telling Lucy today (in lieu of Juliet) that writing a diary / blog can be addictive and that it’s quite hard to break the habit. The first time I miss a day will be quite significant I think. Possibly healthy, I don’t know.

Not much to say today,

Letter writing

Letter writing

lots of letter-writing, ferrying Lucy to & fro from the chocolate-box Oxfordshire village of Great Tew, collecting dry-cleaning, bought a couple of shirts… No giant spiders today. More sympathy cards. They are all nice, but some are nicer than others. Janet has ordered “3 rose plants called “Sweet Juliet” – described as ‘glowing apricot, full in bloom, repeat flowering, with a sweet perfume, upright, hardy & reliable’ – obviously like its namesake”. One for Janet’s garden, one for Richard & Margaret’s, one for us. What a lovely idea. Alice sardonically observed “ours will be the worst”. She has no confidence in my green fingers (she’s right though).

Another letter received today was a charming letter from J’s oncology consultant (chemotherapy) whom we’ve not seen since the spring. He had always been very open about J’s prognosis from the first time we’d met him. I shall write him a thank-you note in due course – and will point out that both the life expectancy estimates I managed to get out of him were under-estimated by quite some months. But just months…

Lucy went to see a friend whose 18th birthday it was – she couldn’t go to the evening party as she’s baby-sitting, but that’s perhaps just as well. Anyway, her friend had received a birthday card from the local MP – David Cameron. I didn’t know whether to be impressed by the thought or nauseated by the opportunism. More of the former, I’m afraid. I stopped to take some photos of an impossibly-long dry-stone wall being repaired  near the village.

Dry-stone wall - detail

Dry-stone wall - detail

Dry-stone wall

Dry-stone wall

In the evening I went for a short run, 4.6km (2.8 miles), neither particularly fast nor slow. For the second time in succession I was asked for directions, this time I was able to help and avoid dropping my iPhone. As is my custom, I listened to a podcast of Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs programme while running. This podcast featured the DJ and radio presenter Danny Baker (a recent cancer sufferer as it happens). He falls into that category of person that you either like or dislike, but, in my opinion, someone whom you can’t fail to be impressed by his talent and vision. “Vision” isn’t quite the right word – perhaps philosophy, outlook or even mantra is better. If you disagree – use the Comment box below…

I updated my marital status on Facebook, which I had been stupidly dreading; however instead of “Single” there was the option for “Widowed”. Which was a little better. Sort of.

I didn’t make it through the day without tears, whether it was finding the receipt for J’s Karen Millen dress, or just one of her scribbled lists or just randomly while driving along. The KM dress was one of J’s great ambitions, and we bought her a nice example on her birthday in January this year, which she did get to wear at least once, maybe more. [So why the tears???] . There are more of J’s lists on pieces of paper than spiders in the house and I’m not quite ready to discard any of them yet. And the random bit is just random. Like now.

About hodders

Husband and proud father of two daughters. Now a widower. Trying to balance between not dwelling on Juliet's death, but telling the world how much I loved her. Tricky.
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One Response to Dry-stone walling and the power of lists

  1. Pingback: Juliet’s rose | Some Distant Shore

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